My last post was on October 21, 2015, and only days after my regular, full time position had been eliminated from a company that I had initially started working for almost 20 years earlier. The word I used at the time to express my feelings was panic. Totally appropriate panic. At that time I had every intention of documenting my experience here, but feelings changed often and fast and I didn't really know how I wanted to express them. I didn't know how much I really wanted people to know.
Prior to losing my job, I had been going to a chiropractor regularly for treatment of a bulging disc in my lower back. By the end of the first week off, I could barely walk. My injury escalated quickly and I soon couldn't drive. I had troubles with getting into doctors and getting prescriptions filled. Luckily, Josh still worked for the company I had been let go from and they allowed me to get on his insurance as a domestic partner. I still experienced trouble though with long waits to get appointments. Eventually I did get into a pain specialist and received two steroid injections and some physical therapy.
I went 3 months without working. About 2 months in I wrote a friend who works in a tax office and asked if they were going to be hiring any additional seasonal help for tax season. I wrote this message on the Friday before Christmas. On Monday before Christmas I was called in to meet with her boss and I was offered the job. I still wouldn't start work for another month, but it was nice to go into the Christmas and New Years holidays knowing that I had future work coming.
Having the steroid injections and physical therapy along with getting out of the house to work really helped my back. It still gets tired and sore by the end of the day, but I wake up every morning functional and fairly flexible. I can now stretch my whole body without shouting out in pain...in fact stretching feels good again.
It has now been 5 months (WOW! I really hadn't realized that number till just now) since I lost my job and to be honest, I've ran the gamut of emotions. Mostly I've been okay with it. I had been worried about downsizing prior to it happening. Not necessarily just to me, but even to my whole department so I had already starting thinking of back up plans. This made the situation easier at times. I was already in the habit of thinking of alternatives. However, I was not prepared to put any of them in place, so being forced to make decisions or take action on anyone's terms but my own created occasional feelings of hatred and anger. Some necessary changes in life style also fostered this emotion.
There is only a little over a month left of tax season, so I need to get serious again thinking about what is next. The thought process hadn't ever stopped, but it did slow down enough for me to fully engage myself in the temporary position that I currently hold.
I am contemplating several ideas which I am ready to write about as I continue to research and pursue new opportunities. There are two educational options that I am interested in. It's a possibility that one or both of them could become a reality. It is also possible that I may go in a totally different direction all together.
On the Stanley/Williamson household front...we've experienced change. We think a little differently on our entertainment choices. With me not being very functional in the beginning due to my back issues, the dynamic around the house has changed. Some changes were only temporary and went back to normal as my injury healed and I became more capable. Other changes have stuck and created compromise and different ways of sharing responsibilities.
Rizzoli has also experienced great change. She went from having normal alone time with cuddle time with mommy and daddy on the weekends to having almost 24/7 cuddle time with mommy for 3 months and then still greater than part time cuddling for the past 2 months. She also has had to adapt to new furniture and rooms in the house being rearranged. Still, she is as lovable and cuddly as ever.
Our bathroom remodel did happen as scheduled and it has been soooo nice to have a bathroom that I am not embarrassed by and that the door can stay open. I don't have to worry about Rizzoli going in and getting into dust and tiles falling onto the floor.
I hope to be posting more regularly now that the shock and panic has worn off, that I've gotten back into the working world even if my current position is only temporary, and that I have new thoughts and exciting ideas running through my head.
We can plan life out all we want. We will do what we can to shape it into what we want it to be. In the end, outside forces will try to propel our paths into alternative directions and we will adapt the best if we are open and flexible to what new things can lay ahead. My new life/journey is just beginning. I am experiencing the start of my 2nd Act. With as much as I've learned about myself in the past couple of years and months, I am greatly looking forward to it.
